A narcissist is a person with an inflated sense of self-importance and excessive admiration for oneself, and many are pathological liars. Narcissism or a Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a mental condition where people are known to possess abnormally high levels of self-importance, exaggeration, lack of empathy, arrogance, and envy, among other generally undesirable traits.
Their condition is characterized by a deep need for admiration and the creation of a false sense of identity, enabling the narcissist to comfortably hide behind a mask of overflowing confidence. Narcissists often appear to be strong, successful, confident, and charming. To them, image is everything.
Their deep need to feel superior against others is what motivates them to look better no matter what it takes. To appear to be the person they want you to perceive them to be, they will lie constantly and effortlessly.
Narcissists develop their false self, or façade to protect themselves from either shame, pain from unresolved childhood trauma, or deep insecurity. Their need to prevent acknowledging or accepting these feelings causes them to resort to scheming, deceit, and manipulation. Although they project a high-and-mighty alternate persona on the outside, they really don’t believe themselves to be worthy deep down.
There are several reasons why narcissists resort to lying and manipulation when dealing with others. Here are just a few:
They Lie Because It Has Become Their Default Behavior
Narcissists simply have relinquished their true, deeply-wounded selves for a compensatory false self that is characterized by its grandiosity, delusions of grandeur, and an unfounded sense of entitlement.
They resort to lying because they are unable to face their true emotions. Eventually, this becomes a habit; their default behavior and mindset. Narcissists bury all traces of their true selves, especially their vulnerability, and remain convinced that they’ve never been in a better place than before by wearing their masks. They become pathological liars, losing any ability to be guided by a moral compass.
They Lie Because They View People as Objects
Narcissists view people as objects, and because of that, they feel justified exploiting them. They lack empathy, as no-one’s feelings matter – except their own. They’re incapable of thinking about any kind of consequences as narcissists are constantly in survival mode, thinking only of the present moment, and any kind of action made is justified to satisfy their needs here and now.
Without any regard for consequences, or of other people’s welfare or feelings, narcissists constantly resort to lies, without guilt or remorse. Narcissists lie in a multitude of ways. Often they do so by withholding information and through evasion or obfuscation.
Narcissists resort to lying purely because it enables them to present themselves in the way they would want their chosen target to see. It is key to managing their impression and manipulating their target. Narcissists often manipulate a person psychologically, by making them question their own credibility and sanity, and planting seeds of doubt and confusion in their mind.
They Lie to Gain Sympathy
Narcissists are also fond of playing the victim. They will try to make others feel sorry for them. However, if you feel sorry for a narcissist it can open the door to being abused and victimized. If a narcissist tries to make you feel sorry for them, there’s nothing authentic about it, although their acting can be faultless. Your sympathy cannot heal a narcissist; it will only validate that they have power over you and can manipulate you.
Given all the reasons why narcissists ultimately resort to lying, deceit, and manipulation to get their way, a person with narcissistic personality disorder is naturally a pathological liar, whether they like it or not, whether they are fully aware of it or not.
A narcissist, simply, is lacking the ability to empathize or consider consequences, and for this reason, they may see nothing wrong in the act of lying, as it is key to justifying their beliefs and behaviors.
When dealing with narcissists, objectivity is essential. It is not about you. Because they can be pathological liars, you must not take everything they say at face value. There are a multitude of ways to help a narcissist, but it takes acceptance of their condition and dealing with them objectively first.